Dating after 50 ih oregon
Tessina, a psychotherapist in Southern California and the author of 13 books on relationships, including Whether couples are staying together because they (consciously or unconsciously) are holding out for a reconciliation or because they feel they can’t afford to maintain their lifestyle on their own, they need to take some a few important things into consideration.
In many states, a couple needs to live apart physically for a certain period of time (often a year) before they can begin divorce proceedings.
(MORE: How to Tell Your Adult Children You're Divorcing) The Ties That Bind?
According to Tessina, the most common thing that keeps people together is money — or more to the point, the lack thereof.
“Many states require that couples live apart for a specific amount of time — a year and a day, in North Carolina, for instance — before the divorce can proceed,” Sodoma says.
“We wanted the kids to feel they could come home for Christmas,” says Ian Kent, whose three children in their 20s have careers in Los Angeles, half a continent away from their suburban Chicago childhood home."It took time for Karen to re-establish her public relations career to a point where we could both afford new homes we loved," he says."We also needed to get used to the idea that even though our marriage failed and we were no longer living the suburban dream, we had not failed as people and we had not failed our children.” The Hidden Costs While many “separated” couples decide to stay together because they believe they’ll save money, sometimes the reality is precisely the opposite, says Nicole Sodoma, a family law attorney licensed in North Carolina and Washington.Living in two homes also means two sets of utility bills and divorced people often wind up paying more in taxes.In many states, all assets in a long-term marriage — saving and investment accounts, primary (and second) homes, boats, valuable jewelry, businesses — get divided (often in half) and one partner also might end up having to pay the other alimony.